How ’bout you?
Recently, a friend of mine and I were joined at lunch by a woman who was romantically interested in him; we’ll call him Tom.
Tom enjoyed her attentions, and it was obvious I was the budding romance “buffer” of the conversation, because she talked directly to ME (a lot) about the trials and tribulations she’s going through with her ex.
It’s already a little dicey talking about an ex with someone you’re newly interested in, and maybe she felt more comfortable saying it to me knowing Tom was at the table in ear shot, soaking in all of the info she was sharing.
Trouble is, she WOULDN’T STOP. So this lovely lady who was once interesting to Tom just talked her way out of it because she simply wouldn’t shut up or let either one of us get a word in edgewise. And now he’s not interested!
Seems that having unbalanced conversations, meaning you talk to much or not enough, can make you seem boring. There are few other tell-tale signs you might be boring people to tears:
-Never having an opinion or taking a stance
-Not having “cognitive flexibility”, meaning you don’t have a sense of humor!
-Never stepping out of your comfort zone, and doing the same thing all the time.