Saint Patrick’s Day SAFETY WARNING: Don’t Touch the Molten Lava – Top O’ the Irish Soda Bread!

DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME:
Do NOT touch the top of the Irish Soda Bread from Jewel, if you toast it! [Do schmear it with Land O’ Lakes butter, afterward, though].
There must be some kind of professional Irish person, who knows how to handle this situation. I should have called a McHotline. I’m just a regular Irish-American mutt, really – my family is like a patchwork quilt.
I should have used the Toast Tongs my mother gave me. Goggles might have been a good idea.
I should have known that giant granules of sugar would turn to lava from County Hell on top of that toast.
Now I have a Nifty McBlister on the Tip O’ Me Finger. Be Careful! I fell into Fitz.
This is nasty Leprechaun stuff… My father used to say that the Luck O’ The Irish is really just Murphy’s Law.
I thought he was a Kil-Flop-N-Top curmudgeon… But now I’m starting to get it LOL